Been a Hot Minute

Hi there!

Soooooo, I haven't blogged in what feels like FOREVER. In the past few weeks I've had a few friends ask me why I stopped blogging. I have to say, it was special to hear people missed my words. This blog started as a therapeutic tool to help me heal. It has turned into so much more and I'm grateful to all of the wonderful friends I've met through the blog site. So, hopefully this is the first of many more consistent blogs. :) I'll try not to take so much time off between entries...

Well, this year started off pretty freaking crappy. We all know what happened in December (if you don't, read this entry) and that just pushed me deep down into a dark dark place. I wasn't in a good place and had a really tough time climbing my way out. I am happy to say I'm in a good place now. I wasn't sure how or if I'd pull through, but the strength of self is amazing and I made it.

This has been the greatest summer in a really really long time. I was able to get back into the Philly music scene and I'm THRILLED to be there. I didn't realize how much I missed the original music scene until I got back in! I've discovered a few "new" local bands and I'm loving it. I also got to spend some real quality time with ALL of my best friends....specifically those that live way too far for my liking. I spent July 4th with my Leighski and the family W and then went down to FL to see NessaBear and all of her girls. I got to meet her future hubby and helped Vanessa pick the most beautiful wedding dress. It was an honor to be there for that special day. I saw New Kids on the Block TWICE in two days and Donnie Wahlberg is now following me on Twitter. Yes, I died and still check it almost daily to make sure it wasn't a dream. (Are you on Twitter? Follow me at @Champagne37!) Hubby and I went on the most extraordinary vacation to Mexico to celebrate our 5th wedding anniversary and we're already planning a return visit. It was absolutely incredible and we cannot wait to be back there. You can check out my review of the resort here.

Oh, did I mention that I graduated with my Master's in April? Yeah, that happened too! Now I just need a J-O-B! Know anyone who may work for a company that's actually hiring? #toughoutthere

So anyway, thank you for your patience in waiting for my triumphant return to the blogging world. I'M BACK, BABY.

The Light

So one of my very best friends from high school recently found my blog. He and I hadn't been in touch for about 10 years and we reconnected a little over two months ago. It's always nice to reconnect with special people and it has been great catching up. Last week he read my blog for the first time and told me he thought it was dark. Not gonna lie... I was a little offended. I don't think it's dark; I think that it's honest. There are days when I feel dark and if my blog reflects that then so be it. Anyway, he recommended that I blog about all of the positive/good things in my life. While it's impossible to list everything that is good in my life, there are a few things for which I'm grateful EVERY SINGLE DAY. So, here goes:

• Hubby: I meant what I said on your birthday. You make it all okay and I couldn't do it without you. Thanks for choosing me for your forever. Love you. Love your show.
• Momma: You amaze me every day and have for the last 32 years. I only hope I can be half the mom to my child(ren) that you were to me. I am who I am (good and bad) because of you. (Well, except the OCD.)
• Sister: Twenty-one years and you're not sick of me; you deserve a medal. You are (always have been and always will be) my person. I love you always.
• My girls: They say our friends are the family we choose for ourselves. Thank you for choosing me and for always being there. The bonds that tie us are unbreakable and I'm thankful every day that I can call you my family.
• Jake & Sara: You are my heart and I couldn't love you more. Jake, thank you for ALWAYS making me smile. Sara, it has been way too long since we've seen each other but I love you every single day. I hope you both know that I will ALWAYS be here for you for anything that you need.
• My work family: Simply stated, I love you guys; you make my every day worth it. Thanks for all the laughs and love.
• My friends: I don't know what to say other than I FREAKING LOVE YOU.
• My GSC family: I am who I am because of you. Whether it's a week, a month, a year, or more, we're family and I cherish that always. My memories of our time(s) together fill my heart with such joy. I am thankful for every memory we made in our home away from home.
• Puppers: I know you can't read but you are my love. Your kisses make my bad days better and my good days great. Thanks for knowing exactly what I need and for being the best cuddle-bugger ever.
• The Internet: THANK YOU Al Gore (kidding!) for making it possible for me to stay connected to everyone. I love knowing that with just a click we can reconnect and check-in to let each other know we're thinking of the other. Let's try to do it in person more frequently.
• My former campers: Many of us are still in touch and some of you even read this blog. Please know how special you made my summers. I learned more from you in those years than I could ever have hoped to teach you. I am so proud of the young men and women you have become.
• New Kids on the Block: You have brought a smile to my face since 1988. You filled my childhood with love and excitement and taught me how to dance like no one is watching. Your reunion reminded me that dreams really can come true if you never give up. Thanks for making this only child one of a million sisters.  (Readers: you can make fun of me all you want for having them on my list. I'm dancing like no one is watching and I don't care.)
• Ellen: Thanks for proving that kindness and generosity are the most beautiful accessories we can wear. You inspire me every day.
• The little things: You matter so much and I'm thankful that I know that.
• The person who told me to write this blog: Thank you. You are very special to me and I love you.

(These are in no particular order by the way!)

With that, I'm going to sign off. This blog could wind up being a million words long because I'm that lucky. While the last two years have been a struggle for our family, I've never lost sight of the fact that I'm a pretty lucky lady. I have a great husband, an awesome mom, amazeballs friends, and a job that allows me to help people (almost) every day. Yes, some days are dark but that's okay because no day lasts forever.

I'm a Donnie Girl in a Donnie World

I haven't blogged in about a month and I figured it was time. (And my best friend gave me a little nudge the other day.) So I started thinking about what I could write and I just wasn't sure. I've been wanting to write a blog about my camp family but I just can't put my GSC experience into words....yet. (That blog will come though!) So, what to write? Early last month I stumbled upon a new book that was being released on October 2nd. It was called Five Brothers and a Million Sisters and it was a biography about my favorite group of all time. Preorder? Absofreakinlutely!!! Well, here we are October 5th and I'm already almost done the book. (When I can, I read on the train to/from work.) The book has brought back so many wonderful memories and has just reaffirmed my love for those five boys from Boston. The book includes quotes from fans of all ages and, though I know nothing of these women, I feel a connection to each of their stories. Their stories are my stories. Our memories mirror each others. We really are a sisterhood: a family of blockheads that has been connected for 24 years, even through the 14 years our boys were "absent." We are a group of women (and some men) who refer to ourselves as a family and not as just fans. These guys played such an integral part of my childhood and I didn't realize just how much until I started reading this book. Today, they STILL play an integral part of my life, though their role is now a different one. It's less about school girl crush and more about respect, loyalty and appreciation. And so was born my inspiration for this blog post...

If you know me at all, you know I'm very proud of my love for the New Kids. They're all over my desk at work and there isn't a day that goes by when I don't listen to one or more (usually more) of their songs. I get made fun of for it...A LOT. I don't care. These guys helped shaped my youth and continue to inspire me in adulthood. Even at 30+, I can proudly say that Donnie Wahlberg is one of the most relevant inspirations in my life. (In fact, at a recent training of The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People I wrote him as one of my top 3 most inspirational people. Yep, at 30, he's the one that I thought of.) I've been a "Donnie Girl" since 1988. I often joke that he's my "pop" husband and I still fantasize about what it would be like to meet him. As soon as he joined Twitter (follow me at @Champagne37) I started following him. I was one of his first followers and the highlight of 2010 was when he tweeted me. Now I get  lost in the thousands of girls that follow him but his  tweets are still the high points of my bad days. While my love for Ddub started as a school girl crush, it has grown into an adult respect that is difficult for me to put into words. He is, without a doubt, one of the most amazing men I "know." If you don't know his story, read it. Go ahead, roll your eyes, judge me, and call me a dork. I really don't care.

I didn't have an easy childhood. I was raised by a single mom and was forced to grow-up pretty quickly. I didn't experience many luxuries, we just couldn't afford them, but that made me more appreciative of the ones I did have. I count among my luxuries my NKOTB sheets, my black satin New Kids jacket, my cassette tapes, posters, pins, pogs, trading cards, pencil cases, etc. My most prized possession? My NKOTB sleeping bag. I asked my mom for it while I was away at summer camp and she sent it, making a young girl's dream come true. When I sit here and think about all of the New Kids swag I smile a big smile. I still get excited thinking about how much joy that group and their music brought to my life. They were a constant source of joy in what was an otherwise unstable environment. There were a lot of unknowns in my childhood, but one thing I knew was I could always count on the New Kids to make me smile. When they broke up in 1994, I was devastated. But, I was heading to high school and I had new adventures to which I could look forward. Let's fast forward to 2008....the New Kids on the Block reunited and a tour is announced.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh! I. Went. Crazy. All of the excitement and love I felt from '88 to '94 came flooding back. I HAD to get to a show! Imagine my excitement when I saw that they'd be in Atlantic City, NJ on September 27, 2008: the very night I was to have my bachelorette party! ! ! Yep, the stars aligned and I was finally going to get to my first New Kids show. It was AMAZING and I left the Borgata showroom in tears. I was just overcome with emotion at finally having had a dream come true. I waited patiently for 20 years to see "my" boys and it was incredible. I used to be sad that I never got to see a show as a young girl. Now, I'm thankful. I wouldn't have appreciated it the way I do now. When that opening montage asked "Are You Ready?" and answered with "It's Time" I was overcome with a feeling I had never known before. It was so foreign to me and I cried. I still cry watching that montage and I still have a difficult time putting in to words what I feel because of NKOTB. The passion and energy and excitement that the New Kids bring to my life is unmatched by anything else I love it. I went on to attend 3 more shows during the 2008/09 tour and would've done a hundred more if that whole work thing didn't get in the way. Unfortunately I haven't been able to afford any of the cruise events but attending  is on my bucket list. It'll stay there until the guys decide to stop hosting and that ship has sailed (pun intended.) I WILL meet Donnie one day; mark my words. While their reunion filled an unknown void that was present for 14 years, meeting him and thanking him for his years of inspiration will be the ultimate dream come true. I have to do it to be complete.

The New Kids reuniting sparked a new excitement in my life. I was taken back to my childhood and the memories of dancing around my room to Cover Girl came back as if they had happened just yesterday. (I'm not ashamed to admit that this does still happen on some yesterdays.) I was engaged in the hype that was their reunion and was reminded about how important it is to hold the "little" things close to your heart. I was reminded of how important loyalty and passion are to success. I witnessed a devotion and gratitude to the legions of blockheads that instantly welcomed them back after 14 years. This gratitude to their fans is unmatched by any other group in history. (Don't argue with me on this; you won't change my mind.) The New Kids on the Block reuniting reminded me how important it is to never stop dreaming and how important it is to believe in yourself. I am inspired by at least one New Kid every day (thanks, Twitter) and am so very proud to call myself a Blockhead, a Donnie Girl, part of Ddub's army, a fan, and one of a million and one sisters.

This may all seem silly and trivial to you and that's okay. This blog isn't about you. It's about me making sense of my world and the New Kids on the Block are a big part of my world. I honestly believe that I wouldn't be who I am today without them. I feel indebted to each of the guys and hope that some day I can meet them and thank them in person. I could have gone on for pages and pages and pages about what I learned and continue to learn from Danny, Donnie, Joey, Jonathan, and Jordan. I could devote an entire blog (not just a post) to our New Kids family but Blue Bloods is coming on and I need to go watch.

Thanks for reading!

Positivity is not about being soft. It's about being smart. You sucka!